Will the house continue to look whiter than a James Taylor concert? Will 2020 keep destroying everything you love? Will the producers give the people what they want and just make the show about the jury house? Find out on Biiiiiiiiiiiiiig Brotherrrrrrrrrrr!
The episode opens by telling us to witness all the decisions that led to the shocking triple eviction. Shocking? That was one of the most straightforward series of evictions I’ve seen since Big Brother 19. Kevin and David have been on a ring around the rosy on and off the block since the first couple of weeks. Dani did everything she could to sabotage her relationships with a bunch of people in the house. Honestly, the thing I’m thankful for is that we were able to get this all over with in one week rather than drawing it out for three.
We start off with Nicole straight up sobbing. Again, what a shocking turn of events. Cody describes himself as feeling “like a kid in a candy store” because he survived the first triple eviction. My blood pressure immediately spiked because I initially thought he meant that there would be another triple eviction this season. I blame the screen blindness that has been the theme of this year for zapping my intelligence. Cody was actually referring to the fact that this was the first triple eviction in BBUS history. Though perhaps the producers will be doing triple evictions from here on out to get this season over with.
Then we have Renegade Memphis winning the first HOH of the episode. He refuses to do any meetings prior to his nomination ceremony because why should a guy in an alliance feel the need to think about anyone other than himself? Unsurprisingly, because again, none of this was shocking, he picks David and Nicole. I think we can all participate in some conjecture over why Memphis has such an utter, one-sided obsession with David, but I’ll just leave it with “this is uncomfortable at best.”
Christmas states her intention to target Nicole. That’s right. Rather than Nicole targeting women, a woman is targeting Nicole. Now the shoe is on the other foot (no pun intended considering Christmas’s past foot problems). Once Christmas wins the Veto, she keeps the nominations the same, leaving Nicole open for eviction. But how is Christmas going to be able to target Nicole when Memphis is so bizarrely fixated on David? Her brand is being a better minion than the elves are to Santa. Making big moves? They were prophesied, but could they actually come true? Much like this entire year, the plan goes off like a wet fart.
Tyler and Christmas try to rope in Enzo, but Meow Meow pussyfoots around angering an ally and votes for David. Again, no one in this house seems capable of actually thinking for themselves. Prompting us at home to throw a tantrum in a similar tone to this, which upon watching it reminds us of someone else who throws tantrums when things don’t go her way.
Nicole immediately goes on the hunt to figure out who tried to flip the vote. Enzo, who definitely would not be a good candidate for the CIA, informs her that it was Tyler and Christmas. Tyler, sensing he was in trouble because he whiffed a shot for the first time in his Bit Brother career (which kudos), wins HOH. Christmas responds with “hundred percent, hundy,” in a way that made me think of Steve Buscemi’s, “How do you do, fellow kids?”.
Tyler nominates Nicole and Dani, which is absolutely the right decision for his game. They are the two looking to target him, and they’re a tight pair. He then proceeds to win the Power of Veto and keeps his nominations the same. Enzo and Cody both promise Dani they will vote Nicole. We know this to be false because Cody and Nicole have a final two deal. Meanwhile, Cody and Enzo are a part of a final three. Leaving Dani to be the only person in the world who is genuinely shocked at her eviction.
Cody and Enzo have a weird little bro down in the bathroom corner. You can practically smell the Axe Body Spray. Cody and Enzo are planning on targeting the clear alliance, Tyler and Christmas. Dani calls out Tyler and Christmas as a tight pair, which she thinks is a big mic drop. Everyone else can barely suppress saying, “Duh”. We literally saw Cody and Enzo laughing about that obvious duo right before her speech, which is a nice little nod to Dani’s lack of game awareness by the editors.
As Christmas enters the voting booth, she tries to have a swipe of her own by declaring Dani made Christmas’s vote easy. This ends up being one of the funnier moments of the episode, as it’s reminiscent of a nothing fight between two preteens. I think both of them probably came up with better comebacks later and wanted to scream them, but they were too late. Dani is evicted in a unanimous vote. Somewhere, Janelle laughs into her Chardonnay.
This all takes us to the HOH competition, which is called “Nama Stay Off the Block”. It’s a competition in which the players have to take off their clothes while pressing buttons, which is a format we’ve seen before. Personally, my hackles always go up a little bit with these stripping competitions. I’m just not quite sure about asking people to take their clothes off on television for our entertainment when they’re under contract. Though I won’t lie, I chuckled when Christmas said, “holy cow, you guys are good at this.”
Christmas is out first after forgetting that taking her clothes off includes her shirt. Nicole is next out. Christmas seriously can’t get over how good the guys are at stripping. She wonders aloud if they practice taking their clothes off all the time. I suppose when the BB money runs out, these guys have a great back up career.
Enzo follows the women to the bench after being unclear whether his costume was a spider or a monkey. It comes down to Cody and Memphis. Christmas, and everyone, would prefer that Memphis wins. He was our best chance to mix things up a bit because, as stated above, Memphis looks out for Memphis. Alas, Cody wins because, if there’s one thing this year has taught us, it’s to abandon all hope.
Christmas blames Tyler for how the vote went down, saying she’s “furious.” It takes two to tango, Christmas. But I guess while Christmas has branded herself as “friendship” and “loyalty,” that doesn’t include personal responsibility. When did the Christmas spirit get so frigid?
Meanwhile, Nicole asks herself why she despises Tyler and Christmas so much, calling Tyler “boring” and Christmas “vicious.” Honestly, this is pretty funny coming from the woman who is known for lying around until jury and blatantly bullying Bridgette in BB18, but go off, I guess. Nicole also holds it against Christmas that she’s “all in with the guys.” Again, that’s hilarious coming from her. Hello, kettle? This is the pot. You’re black.
Cody and Christmas have a conversation, and the Cody ‘Like Counter’ makes its appearance. Good lord, I get self-conscious about the filler words I use on occasion when I get nervous. This scene cured me of that worry. So, I guess something good has come out of this season.
Nicole again is peeved that Tyler had the nerve to try to get her out in a game that’s about backstabbing. As we’ve seen in the past, it’s only okay if Nicole is the one doing the betrayals. Coco is absolutely puffed.
Tyler throws Christmas under the bus to Cody. Immediately after, Christmas decides to throw Tyler under the bus to Cody. In light of that, I guess it’s going to be really awkward seeing Loyal when she gets home. All that aside, this is the most interesting Christmas has been ever, so props to her. Let’s not do any double standards with this being a good move for Tyler, but we hate on Christmas for doing the exact same thing. I’m thrilled that she’s looking out for herself and actually playing the game. Where has this Christmas been? Honestly, they’re making the right moves for their game. You can’t win the game if you get sent to jury. Either way, though, they’re both totally doomed.
Surprising nobody, Cody nominates Tyler and Christmas. Tyler is the likely target. This won’t save Christmas, though. Christmas will go next, and then Nicole will once again be the only woman left at the end, just as she likes it.